"Cool Beans"

You know what saying I hate? Cool Beans.

You know what saying I can't seem to stop saying? Cool Beans.

Fig. 01: Cool beans.

I'm not even sure where "cool beans" comes from or what it means. But, according to the Urban Dictionary is originated in the 70's, and was made popular by Candance Cameron's character in Full House. A show I never watched. Interesting.

Regardless, I seem to find myself using it more and more often. And, as a result, I seem to find myself loathing myself more and more for using it. Therefor, I've taken to augmenting the phrase in hopes of keeping the aloof, intellectual part of my brain from killing the slightly-less intellectual part that wants to keep chirping: Cool beans. Cool beans. Cool beans.

My new exclamation goes like this:
"As they say at the Arctic Chili Cook-Off: Cool Beans."

Awarsome. Anyhow, you heard it here first.

Apparently, according to my wife, I've also been saying "see you on the other side" a lot. This, my friends, is a completely separate problem.

So, what out there is actually cool beans, you ask?

Well, Stumptown Comics Fest looks like it will very likely be cool beans. This Portland based comic festival prides itself on focusing not just on creators. But, indie comic creators. With creators ranging form Craig Thompson to Tara McPerson, Brain Micheal Bendis and Scott McCLoud being featured, I can only presume that it'll be pretty rad. Or, as they say at the Arctic Chili Cook-Off: Cool Beans.

Also, this morning, I stumbled across the animated short, Flutter. It's one of those quick clips that doesn't necessarily make a lot of sense, but who's visual style and audacity makes it easy to bear its obscure narrative. In some regards, it reminds me of the work of Farel Dalrymple, who is a talented illustrator, but who's most famous work, Pop Gun War, refuses to follow any sort of coherent narrative. But, I also see shades of Aeon Flux there... well, if you remove the violence and leather.

Fig 02: Wonderful, but impenetrable.

BEYOND LAST MINUTE EDIT: Also, since I have your very divided attention, I thought I'd point you in the direction of the 700 Hoboes Project, inspired by John Hodgeman's very funny The Areas of My Expertise.

Anyhow, are there any other cool beans out there I'm missing?

Well, no more need for this site...

Well, I might as well go ahead, throw in the towel and close up shop on this blog. "Why?" You ask. Because, I found another site that does want I always secretly intended this site to do... but better.

Way back in the day, when I first fired up Ye Ole General Admission, I had planned on making it a place where I could post information and links on everything that I think is awesome in the world. Well, fast forward several years, and what do I stumble upon? A site dedicated to awesome things.

Or, specifically... 1000 Awesome Things.

Each day, the author of 1000 Awesome Things offers up his thoughts on a different awesome thing. So far, he's only done about 80 entries, but those entries range from Real Beard Santas to Opening and Sniffing a Pack of Tennis Ball and from Your Pillow to Old, Dangerous Playground Equipment. If you can't find at least one thing on the list that you think is awesome. Then, you might have to reevaluate your definition of the word.

And, to the writers credit, he doesn't just list things he thinks are awesome, but instead each entry is a miniature study of that thing, and why it is awesome. It's some clever writing, and it makes the site worth revisiting.

Awesome. (Or, as I say here, Awarsome.)

Up in the air.

As regular readers (aka: my lovely wife) may remember, I deemed Gulag Orkestar by Beirut the "best album of 2007." So, it probably comes as little surprise that I also really love his new album: The Flying Club Cup

Honestly, I do have to admit that I was a little concerned that I wouldn't like it as much. As amazing as Gulag Orkestar was, I was concerned that what had seemed so novel on the first album would just seem strained and redundant on the second. Luckily, Zach Condon (who it, what, 12?) has changed his focus a bit (from Eastern Europe to Paris), brought in an eight-piece band and was apparently fortunate enough to record in the same church studio used by Arcade Fire's most recent album.

All in all, a great album. And, if you don't like it, well...

Just don't poop on my balloon!

See this balloon?

Happy looking, isn't it? Now, imagine if it had poop on it. Maybe seagull poop, though you can use your imagination and pick another sort of poop.

Doesn't the idea of a balloon with poop on it seem so sad. But, y'know, funny-sad. That's why I'm coining the phase: "Don't poo on my balloon." Or, alternately, "I don't mean to poop on your balloon, but..."

And, its going to be the Greatest Phrase ever!™ So, feel free to use it and spread the word!

Update: I just discovered this page which allows you to stream a new Beirut song, My Night With the Prostitute From Marseille, which will be appearing on some benefit compliation that Natalie Portman is releasing on iTunes. The track is an interesting one, because in some ways its more Postal Service sounding that Beirut.

Why Awarapan is Awarsome

...er... I mean, "awesome."

When my wife and I were in Delhi, we had a chance to go see the movie Awarapan. Since it was a Bollywood flick showing in India, it was in Hindi without English subtitles. As a result, we had to basically try to figure out what was going on based on the action on screen. Luckily, it was an action film, so the action was easy to follow.

And, it was awarsome.

To understand why Awarapan is awarsome, I have to give you a summary of the plotline. It goes without saying that this summary will have spoilers... so if you don't want the "twists" in Awarapan "ruined" then don't read on. If you wish to understand awarsomeness, then do:

Awarapan: the summary
...or, at least what I think happens since I couldn't understand the dialogue.

(Oh yeah, and I'm just telling it in chronological order, since the movie is, like, 99.9% flashback.)

The movie starts, and introduces us to the main character. The main character, although Indian, lives in Hong Kong and works for a mob boss. In addition, as near as I could tell, the main character is also Colin Farrell from Miami Vice, see:

Through flashbacks (wait! What happened to chronological order?), we see a young Colin Farrell in Rajasthan who -along with his best friend- are just starting on their life of crime. On the run from cops, Colin ducks into a market where he runs into a beautiful young lady who he falls for and begins dating in secret.

The young woman introduces Colin to her hobby of buying caged birds and setting them free (not the most subtle of symbolism, but -hey- it films well), and to her Muslim faith. Colin, seems to be able to appreciate bird thing, but just mocks her spiritualism.

Later, the woman's father discovers the romance, gathers a mob and goes to pick a fight with Colin. Confronted by her father, Colin dares the man to shoot him. But, when her father pulls the trigger, Colin has second thoughts and steps aside. Unfortunately ...are you ready for this?... the woman was standing behind Colin, and gets shot and killed!

Fast forward to present day.

Colin's mob boss in Hong Kong is headed out of town. In his absence, the mob boss asks Colin to watch after his wife (an arrangement that generally works out well for everyone). Colin takes his boss's job seriously and proceeds to follow her around town like a stalker while her and her friends engage in the films one true song and dance number. Let's watch:



Not surprisingly, he falls for her. Both because she reminds him of the girl from Rajasthan (so much so, I presumed they were the same character, until Sarah set me straight) and because she's a Muslim (cue more flashbacks). Unfortunately, as he gets to know her more, he discovers that she doesn't love the mob boss. In fact, she's more his slave than wife. In addition, it turns out that her and her preppy friend (see clip above) are planning on escaping. The mob boss, learning this, tells Colin to kill her. This leads to Colin's big moral crisis: Does he gun down her and her country club frequenting pal? Or, does he help her escape?

He decides to do the former. But, tell's his boss he's done the later.

Unfortunately, Colin's best friend turns on him ...which you pretty much knew was going to happen since he smoked and looked a little shifty. The mob boss finds out what's going on, and has Colin captured and beaten extensively. After getting a Hulk-like second wind, Colin escapes; but is found nearly dead, lying next to a Buddhist monestary. One of the monks just happens to be a chubby man that Colin had let live earlier in the film, and -thankful for not being killed by Colin early- takes him in to be healed. It's never exactly explained how the chubby monk-man gets from the deserts of Rajasthan, where Colin had ditched him, to Hong Kong though. Or, perhaps it was; but it was explained with... y'know... dialogue. So I missed it.

Anyhow, that leads to this sequence, which is probably my favorite part of the whole movie:



Yep. Brought back to health at the monestary, Colin discovers Buddhism. Buddhism then gives him the power to go kick some serious ass! The rest of the movie is one prolonged gun battle. Made even more prolonged by the fact that most of it is in slow-motion. Colin kills the mob bosses coke-addled son. There's a huge shoot out in a nightclub. Colin's best friend becomes a good guy again. Then dies. Colin kills the mob boss. Then gets killed himself.

But, he helps the main girl and her sweater-wearing man-child get away in a speedboat.

Awarsome!

OK, so maybe I forgot a scene or two. And maybe I've got the entire plot wrong. Still, any movie who's leason is "Buddhism allows you to kick ass with a cool soundtrack" is awarsome in my book. I really hope they release it on DVD in the States. Though, if they do, I might leave the subtitles off. Something tells me it would be better that way.